Happy November, loves! This month marks my one year! Whoo! 8 days away since my first post and one day ago when I signed up. I can’t believe it’s been a year. What a crazy time… We’ll get into that on my next post. Oh, and if you’re wondering if something looks different around here… then it’s because I’ve updated my page! Minimalism is my heart to the purest. Clean and easy. I don’t prefer too much color and if I do, it’s normally when I’m feeling “bright.” Don’t get me wrong, I love colors, it’s just easier for me to maintain when it’s less. If you’re around me enough, you’ll know that all I wear is white and when there’s a touch of color, it means I’m trying to be bold that day. Otherwise, I do have a wide variety of color; I have the tendency to lean towards white, black, and grey more often plus, sky/denim blue. ANY WHO! It’s been a hot minute! I hope you’ve all succeeded in reaching your opportunities and started your new beginnings last month. Let’s welcome this month with warm wishes for middle ground.
I’ve been a busy bee. Feels like I haven’t had the time to do anything since I got back from my trip. Let’s recap! In the month of October, I restored my friendship with my ex and our terms of civilization has been settled. I cannot be more thankful for what has become of us and even though there’s still some pieces to be solved, I’m happy for myself and him for our new beginnings. I also cleaned up a bit here on my blog.. due to the fact that I felt like I was adding colors and fun to please other people and their opinions. It just wasn’t me and every time I would stare at it, it’d be dead to me. I wasn’t satisfied with the outcome but for now, it’s doable. That’s another thing to get into… My friendships with a lot of people has ended and my networking has continued. I’ve slowed down a bit in my work and social media life which has given me a fresh breath of air. I’ve been so down and under the water that it has made things very difficult to get back up on my feet. Apart of juggling through spacious and mental work, there’s been some obstacles that’s been thrown my way. And although a lot of my positive atmosphere has seemed to perish, I’ve learned to love and embrace the solitude for there, will be lots of changes through my self journey. I’ve completely shut down and given myself some “me time” to search for clarity and also the strength in me has been taking some downtime to regain itself from relapsing. Towards the end of October, my family and I took a trip to San Diego. For those who know me, know that, that’s my hometown. I’ve been raised in the city and now acquired a taste of the suburban neighborhoods. Two totally different spectrum. I forgot how crazy the streets were and so comparable to San Francisco! I think that since I’ve grown so comfortable living here and used to the flat land, I forgot how adaptable I was to the hills. Even when I was younger, I’ve always hated them because they used to scare the shit out of me. I don’t understand how my parents did it! I almost feel like this is the extended summer that I asked for… which was last year. The weather differed drastically when we got there. Coming from 70 degrees to it being 80 with no wind made me feel sick since I’m sensitive to rash weather changes but I think that goes for everyone? If not, I’m just sensitive all around, TBH because my skin started to act up too.
Welcome SANTA MONICA + LA all in one sitting!
PALM TREE CENTRAL, here we come! I decided to try out SIDECAR (a donut shop) because.. why not? And it was cute. The aesthetic was so me. Very urban yet modern to its T. They’re famous for their huckleberry donut which I got and my sister decided on the pumpkin spice donut which I enjoyed too. It’s a tight shop at the corner with little to no parking but what do you expect? It’s LA. The texture was dough-like and very soft, I felt like every time I bit into it, it just crumbled but who expects stiff donuts anyways? It’s always made fresh for why I believe the texture is the way it is. While everyone was starving and thinking of actual food, I was thinking of “INSTAGRAM SHOT!”
- SIDECAR, check
- Santa Monica Pier, check
- Beach, check
Venice beach, here we are!
It was nothing of what I had expected and I didn’t really think it’d be that bad. It reminded me of hippie hill in San Fran for some odd reason, maybe it was because of the smell or the broken down street.. For whatever reason it was, I felt unsatisfied. Every single person who goes there praises it and my expectations were not met. Hey, I can now say I’ve made it, right? Other than that, it didn’t really effect me that much. It was more of an, “what’s next?” type of deal for me. Thankfully, we spent the whole first day at the beach, something I’ve been needing. My 9-5 and school routine wore me out and I hated being stuck in that. It makes me feel like a robot and I hate that feeling more than anything. Any type of routine bores me and strips away all of my creativity and happiness therefore I become a really unhappy individual which can also lead me to being easily agitated and sleepy. Overall, I’m just glad we made it to LA and inhaled some salt water for a bit. It doesn’t stop there!
I love, love Mexican food alongside with Italian food. All I had that day was my donut and it sucked because I was sweaty and hungry, two things every person hates. We finished off our trip and made it to San Diego then decided to check in and grab dinner, thank god! Driving through the city felt incredibly refreshing and I felt like I was a kid again. We decided to see the city skyline and boy, was the sunset the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen… I’ve been chasing sunsets all summer long and I thought I was getting tired of it but that changed everything. You honestly think that things would change by the time you’re all grown up but everything stayed the same as if no time has moved at all. That goes for everything in life though. I feel that even when we grow up, the old places we used to visit, homes that we used to live in and or people that we’ve known for forever, doesn’t really alter their image, the only thing that differs are the colors, texture and ability to work. What a beautiful way to see buildings get older and age through grace/construction work. What a crazy year this has been, what a crazy time I’ve seen things stay the same. San Diego was a hell of a trip and it felt like a blink of an eye. We spent majority of the days at the beach and eating amazing Mexican food, which I didn’t complain about at all. People don’t really know but San Diego has a lot of Spanish influential aspects and I think that’s why I love it so much.
Rich culture, food, people and places that inspires me, draws me in and makes me want to stay. It felt like home but it also felt like a foreign country all at the same time. I truly don’t even know how we lived there because wow, driving is such a bitch. I’ve come to appreciate my small little quiet life in Sacramento but I’ve also grown more love towards the city. Friday, oh Friday. I remember when my grandma from the east would come visit us in San Diego and my parents would take her to Ocean beach; she would collect the sand from each one and take it home with her. It was such a strange thing to me at the time until I grew up and realized how much I wanted to keep memories alive. It’s so different when you don’t live anywhere near beaches or breezes that transpires peace instead of calamity.
MISSION BEACH + OCEAN BEACH
There’s a photo at every step. I never seen oceans so blue and so calming. I guess it was me missing something I haven’t had in a while. All the beaches in NorCal are a bit green, or I’d say, dark.. aside from Tahoe but we all know that Tahoe is distinctive compared to the bay. I found inspiration again – a thing I’ve been lacking for quite some time. This trip has truly brought some life back into me. I used to love photography and dealing with lighting to capture the essence of pure color but throughout time, it faded. Thankful for the colors, sunlight and breeze, I was able to take photos of sceneries and my family members. There’s nothing more fulfilling when picking up the camera and just getting lost within it. It was as if someone lit a fire in me again and I knew right there and then that everything in my life can continue to be great again. It’s up to me who has taken on the road and drive through it. I wish I could say that this was my career, a job that I could do for forever and not get bored with, but my time span with everything seems to shorten after I finish the project. I constantly yearn for new things and backgrounds so that my inspiration can constantly stay afloat. I’m just that type of person who finds something they love, dive right in, finish it and never look back until the time comes again.
San Diego Zoo, Balboa Park & La Jolla Cove
A trip it is. Being in the old places we used to go to during field trips felt all too nostalgic. I could see my little 12-year-old self running around and fascinated by the water itself. Something about the water that draws me in, maybe it’s the stillness or the fact that you can submerge yourself in it and feel with one. My nephew. Prime example of being curious to the world and how new everything seems to be – the freshness and clean air intoxicated in your lungs and pushes back out. I never thought that life could be that beautiful and horrific all at the same time. Before we had gone to Balboa Park, we started with the San Diego Zoo! It was saddening seeing all the animals being caged up and also crazier how indifferent I felt when I got there. It was like I was waking up on Christmas morning – happy, jolly, and nothing in the world could stop me. Any type of places that makes me feel like a kid again is my go-to spot; a place where I can be myself and enjoy with my heart with no judgements and side eyed stares. (Of course, I still get them because I’m a 22-year-old who looks like a 16-year-old but you get the point.) We all want to be nothing more than just a child with no responsibilities or care in the world. I spent a wild amount of my time this year feeding into other people wants and not listening to my own. A part of me knew that it wasn’t right, but the other parts somehow felt that it was going to ease the pain and make me feel less of the hurt if I just went along with it and “go with the flow.” Obviously, for apparent reasons, it has done nothing but dragged out my feelings that were unwanted and I felt sick to my stomach to face the truth. Being in SoCal has given me so much new energy that I feel almost at peace with myself, if anything, I think I’m already there. Those days spent there felt like the fastest days of my life and I could not be more thankful for the time that was given. I always find myself growing closer and appreciating my family a bit more each time we go on trips. We all get so distracted with our daily routines and lives that we forget how to enjoy our times that we have left with one another. Not to say that my family doesn’t already stress that concept as it is, but to say that we all can come together in one big city and still do our thing to the fullest means the entire world to me. The breeze, water, sunset, food, everything felt different to me. I’ve learned to love life, again. EMBRACED the changes and accepted the truth, the one right in front of me.
San Diego, you’ve been pleasant! Appreciation taken. Love made. Peace given.
Explore till you reach the end of the earth. Discover till you can’t anymore. Create till your hands tire itself out. Because adventure is there!
Ps. I didn’t showcase all of the photos, but I will in my next post. Lengthy read isn’t it? Thank you for stopping by and appreciating life with me. I’ll see you next week, love!