Hello love 

Hello love 

I hope you’ve been having a great start to 2017 and have been doing amazing.

We’re half way into March, oh how quick the time passes us by. DAYLIGHT savings has been zooming and I feel like the year is almost over. I’m basically 30 already. Okay, I’m being dramatic, but you get the point.

It’s time to shine. Your time to find inspiration. Don’t stop creating and craving. As I reiterate, the world is yours. You are bright and beautiful. You are the star that will continue to shed its dust even when you disperse into the far, far ends of the galaxy. You are love but you are no longer my light.

It’s been a week since my last update and I’ve been busy. I do apologize for being so caught up in myself but again, you can’t expect too much from me. I tweeted out the other day that I felt like my life was under a microscope and the pressure was a bit too high in demand which I’ve stated out to a friend last week when we went out for pizza and beer. I needed to unplug from the world, settle and relay these past few mishaps that occurred. I just wanted to live.

I spent the weekend with my family and found flashes of creativity. The weather was amazing too! I was able to let the breeze whisk me away and get lost within myself. It was peace, bliss and serenity all in one. I paused for a second and finally let time stop. I looked around and appreciated all that I had then ran towards my niece to play hide and seek. I love them to death and couldn’t imagine my life any other way. As we all ran in the tall grass being carefree, it made me feel lifted, weightless and good. It was as if I stopped time again and captured a memory I would replay over and over vividly.

I’m still putting all my effort and time into positivity and acceptance. As much as I would like to to say that I’m great and doing well, I’m actually just coasting. I still miss the very person who broke me (so, so hard). My eyes are becoming less watery but my heart is still sore. I couldn’t ever hate the person who helped me find myself besides, we all know how I truly feel anyway.

It’s all been emotional waves and sensitivity that’s been reoccurring in my days. My grandma has been telling me that when things are meant to be, I’ll never feel the complications of force pulling against me, it should only work with me. And I could say that was true. Throughout my entire relationship with him, we both always felt like we were fighting a fight that couldn’t be won; constant battle if we should just give up or keep on pushing and in the end… it became something we already knew the ending to. We just kept going against it in hopes that it would work out and be much more, but the truth was always there. We were just running away, together and from each other as crazy as that may be. As I would like to call us, ‘almost’ – so close, yet so far.

I’ve been nothing but obsessed with Khalid, been playing his album nonstop and I don’t even understand how I’m not tired yet. It’s speaking volumes right now. My favorite lines are, “Maybe you weren’t the one for me, but deep down I wanted you to be.” Take a listen.

This is a new time for me. A time where I only identify myself with only me and no one else.

Today, you let go.
(yes… yes it is)

TOP: Hollister Co, Target / BOTTOMS: H&M / FOOTWEAR: Forever 21 / ACCESSORIES: Alex & Ani, The 5th Watches, Tilly’s Cap, Choker from Forever 21

Funny story: My idea about this outfit all came based upon the statement piece, the camo jean jacket. Casual right? Simple. I’ve been on the hunt for this damn thing for three weeks now, but originally the spark came from my nephew’s sweater. He wears it often and it triggered a need in me where I had to get a hold of it. It was so fashion forward and timeless. I stopped looking for it after realizing how crappy other materials were then a couple days ago, we went to my second home (target) for baby clothes and bam, I stumbled upon it while we were walking towards the checkout. It’s true, the best things come when you’re not looking for it. THANK THE LORD, I fit kids sizes! CONTINUE TO BE TRENDY 🤙

#MONDAYMOOD – I burnt my knuckle from the curling iron in the morning. Made an official new friend after class and bonded over our awkwardness. Then he found a ladybug who landed on my cap after talking for a good 30mins or so. Went home after and then, two more ladybugs ended up on me again. Let’s call this luck. We both used to have butterflies fly around us every so often and it stopped when the relationship ended. So, what does that mean? Heck, who knows. Symbolism comes in all different shapes and forms. Let’s just say this is the ‘new awakening’ to moving forward, learning to accept the outcome and letting go of what isn’t meant for me so I can embrace what is.

I’ve been connecting really well with new people who has encouraged me  to see happiness. My own happiness. I thank you, for giving me so much more than just the dull and ignorance. Plus, the reassurances that I’ve needed.

May this week be another blessing into the jar. Stay lifted. I love you.

Goodbye, love.

xx,
missmaichi 💛

 

What we deserve…

What we deserve…

When we look at ourselves in the mirror, what do we see? Do we see disappointment? failure? ugliness? We see too much of our own flaws that no one else sees. It erupts us from the real and true therefore we become our own worst enemies (at times). Crazy doesn’t even begin to explain the root of all causes.

We’re too hard on ourselves, judging and misleading what we think are flaws but may be beautiful to others. We are species that are self-destructive. There’s just too many negatives in this world to remove from or abide with. We need to eliminate the thoughts that don’t broaden our horizons and gather the ones that do–deeper meaning, viewing and understanding. There’s always more to the surface than just those pretty fiery eyes and bubbly smile.

You are art.

I started to seek for light and guidance. To make things make sense, I had to be willing to let my mind showcase all the possibilities that were open. I started to realize that the manipulative will always be manipulative and the liars will always be liars. There was no sense of trying to change or accept that it was “normal.” I understand that those who lie are afraid of what it can do to the bond that was created but lying… and thinking that it’s okay… how do you sleep at night? How do you let those meaningless words slip out of your mouth and act like they’re real? How do you assure that there’s trust? That there’s real love and connection. Hiding behind words and phrases only to manipulate the other person to believe you when you don’t even believe yourself… how can you say you’re true as ever but you’re too scared to step into the light and let yourself be seen as who you truly are. Are you that damaged? Are you that hideous? Are you that afraid of who you are? Do you feel that you deserve nothing in this world? Or do you honestly think that you’re a good person. Whatever it is, fix it. Love yourself. Value yourself. You deserve just that… self-love and acceptance. From you and those around you, always.

I’ve met far too many people in this lifetime who are too hard on themselves or pretend to be someone they’re not. It’s not healthy and detrimental to your well-being. It’s important for you to stop feeling inadequate because of your self-esteem. Build it. Be bold and beautiful. Don’t let anyone tell you that you’re not good enough. You have to be good enough for yourself. You have to find your self-worth. You are in control. But if you feel that you’re not good enough, then you’ll never be good enough for anyone else even for yourself.

(You taught me to love myself from every end even to places that I’ve never imagined you seeing or that I didn’t want to reach and now it’s time to teach yourself to love all and everything that you are, that you’ve always been. Be okay with that, love. Just be okay.)

If there’s any comparison that needs to be done, let it be between the person in the mirror and the person you desire and were created to be.

When you reflect upon who you are and how you feel, are you happy? If you’re not, then what are you going to do about it? Everything stems from something. Take a step back and tell yourself that you are worthy of love, light and happiness. So, don’t be afraid. The moment you let fear win, is the moment you lose.

To step out of that “comfort” is considered “bad” and “unorthodox” but to be afraid… that, that will always be normal. Don’t let that take you two steps back if you already foresee yourself being so much more than what you are now. The key thing in life is to never give up. We sell ourselves short when we walk away. I always kept mindful of growth and potential in relationships because you honestly never know what can evolve from it. You shouldn’t give up when things go bad or when they become too strenuous, you keep pushing until you’ve reached the top of the mountain. But who said there was only one? There’s always twists and turns in life, just be willing to stay patient and let things become what they need to become.

Either it be good or bad, I always somehow found more pieces of me in other people than I ever did within myself. I’ve learned so much about who I was, another side to me that I didn’t believe could be real. And until you experience the pulling and pushing of another soul, you’ll never understand. They put their hands into your heart and reach inside to drill or pick apart vessels that you, yourself couldn’t do on your own. And this is why people are good for you. Solitude can be good too. Balance is what we deserve. What we need to keep on going. You can never have too much or too little of anything but always keep yourself afloat and paddle through while you can.

We deserve more. More out of people, out of life and love. We settle because that’s what we think we deserve but when you set your standards too low, you’ll be blinded and not see the open doors or opportunities that come rolling by. If you feel that your life is at its best of light, sit and let it settle in. Improving and wanting more for yourself should never be shamed upon or looked wide-eyed.

We deserve truth. We deserve love. We deserve honesty. We deserve substance. We deserve stability and security. We deserve happiness. We deserve forgiveness. We deserve an answer. Most of all, we deserve peace. Peace of mind. Peace of heart. And peace of all kinds. So let’s give that to ourselves.

I’m in it for the long run, are you?

Thank you, Pierre Alex Jeanty, for shedding so much light into my soul and helping me slowly mend my broken heart. After reading “To The Women I Once Loved,” I began to dig deeper into comprehending the aspect of why men do what they do. Of course, each to their own but if you’re going through it, please read, you won’t regret it.

Everyone I know is going through a break up and 2017 barely started, but know that there’s more love after this. There’s more goodness after this. Continue to keep loving yourself because it’s only you in the end who will love you more than anyone else. I love you guys. Thank you so much for the support and love that I’ve gotten from you all, it means so much to me. We can only go up from here.

xx,
missmaichi 💛

La vita è bella, la vita è amore

La vita è bella, la vita è amore

Life is beautiful, life is love

Fall in love with yourself and you will fall in love with life. Not only will love solve all of the world’s problems but our values and worth will be equal. Then again, who said life was perfect?

HAPPY MARCH TO YOU BEAUTIFUL HEARTS AND SOULS 😘💖 This month is a new month to #beginagain so please, don’t screw this up 😉

I haven’t felt this comfortable in my own skin since January, I believe or in October of 2016. Bare. Naked. Open and overwhelming excited about what my body looks like. No, I’m not in tip top shape nor is my face completely acne scar free but that’s not going to stop me from loving myself. I danced and sang my heart out, all while being naked in the morning. Vibrancy and absolute happiness. I continued to lay in bed afterwards under the sun and began to remind myself of how lovely I was regardless of how mentally fucked up I am, possibly even damaged… I know it won’t be long till I start seeing the twinkle in my eyes and feeling myself get back into my groove. I feel it coming and it’s not too far. Change your perspective on life and see how dramatically it begins to shift. Don’t let negativity deteriorate you.

Wednesday Wunders: Remember when you were young and you thought that the entire world was your playground? It still is, you just have to find resources to utilize to its fullest of potential. Yes, we’re talking about potential again. Even though it can be bad because people are people and we have feelings too…

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TOP: Tilly’s, Francesca’s / BOTTOMS: H&M / FOOTWEAR: Adidas

I shouldn’t keep soaking up all the resources from people and situations till they’re all dried up and dead. I was reading online today about astrology (yes, I am into that) and apparently as a Sagittarius, that’s what has been happening lately; I shouldn’t then leave and walk away without thanking them. I’m not saying that I don’t because I do. I have the tendency to turn the page after and it causes me to have bad karma so I must keep weary upon my actions and how I treat people. As we all believe that we are good people, in which, yes we all are, there are times where the bad gets the best of us. We still do hold very dark and mysterious traits that no one else knows about. Heck, sometimes we don’t even know about it ourselves. SO, here’s 2017! TO MORE CHANGES. I’ve learned so much after my break up and goodness, am I glad. If I didn’t learn anything at all, welp, that means I didn’t grow or mature as I should’ve.

Learn to cherish the little things. Something I have to keep reminding myself for the simple reason that I’m too forward and future prone. I’m always thinking ahead and never really truly living in the moment. I mean those moments where the time is being played in slow motion and you can’t help but smile because of how pure it truly is. Sadly, those occasions are rather rare for me nowadays.

I’m focusing on healing mentally. Still having my days but I’m getting there like I stated before. There’s nothing that I feel in this world that could stop me from bettering myself unless, god forbid I die or something… No pessimism here. 🙅 Day after day, time and acceptance will release me of this treachery.

(I have unconditional love for those who see worth and value to me and my name but to others who don’t see the same, I have no use or energy to put a mutual agreement to. My energy shouldn’t be wasted nor shall my time.) LOVE CAN BE CRAZY AND BLINDING SOMETIMES.

#GREYMATTER has been in my wardrobe for quite some time now and I don’t think it’s going anywhere anytime soon. I cannot believe how amazing these shoes are left alone my obsession for the cardigan. I feel like I always wear it now because of how lightweight it is plus it’s slouchy and that’s the best part. Athletic wear is trending!! Bring all of your nikes, adidas and pumas out to play! NO SHAME in the game. Casual or dressy, dress to inspire girly!

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Been craving SUSHI for months and this has changed my life! YES. I have no idea what’s going on with me lately but this is all I’ve been eating. I no longer crave American Food or Italian left alone Mexican Food. I don’t mind it, it’s perfect. NEXT – We’re gonna be learning to DETOX WITH TEA TOX… AND ALSO SMOOTHIES. MAINLY smoothies… 😃 So watch out for that in a couple of days.

We carry on the changes we’d like to see as we continue to grow and flourish into stronger versions of ourselves. How can you expect to change the world if you can’t even change yourself? We’re stuck to our old ways but that doesn’t decimate the entire equation, it only adds more factors and variables into play. Stop believing that the world is against you. Even at your darkest of times, you must find the light. You must find the good in the bad.

Let’s keep pushing! Let’s let love and light in. Sustain genuineness and consistency. Nothing and no one can stop you from achieving your dreams and goals in life, love.

MARCHING INTO THE WEEK – STAY POSITIVE AND BRIGHT. SPREAD LOVE AND PEACE. SUPPORT AND CELEBRATE.

Live and let live.

xx,
missmaichi 💛